Game of Choice

Life is a game of choices.

You don't get to see every consequence of each choice, but usually you can see enough to make informed decisions.

Sometimes though, you'll get thrown a left curve consequence, and end up in the hospital with a concussion and eye patch. (Although eye patches are cool.)

I'm realizing this more and more, and realizing that each choice I make is a choice of consequences.

True freedom, to quote Lord Vetinari, "is the freedom to take the consequences." (Going Postal, Terry Pratchett).

This includes bad consequences.

I know people who seem to think "freedom" is freedom from bad consequences.

This is not true.

A child sticks their hand on a hot stove. He is burned. He has pain. Choice - consequences. (In the case of my nephew, a stubborn THREE TIMES. He did eventually stop choosing to do that.)

Currently, I am choosing to blog about choice and consequences, instead of eating lunch, even though it's far past lunch time, and I did not have anything resembling a decent breakfast. I'm choosing the consequence of writing, and having emotional outlet and satisfaction, and the consequence of I'm going to be ANGRY hungry later, possibly without the physical or emotional resources to make food.

I'll just go start some rice. Excuse me.

Now I feel better - knowing I have chosen a set of consequences that will (most likely) turn out well for me. I have time to finish this blog (rice takes a bit to cook), and there will be food for me when I'm done!

Not everybody has the ability to choose their own consequences. People who were sadly raised without consequences, never seem to grasp the concept that the laws of universe apply to them. People who have endured trauma, abuse, or imprisonment, lose the capacity to choose for themselves, and that has to be rebuilt through extensive work. (I understand this from the inside.)

But grasping the concept that I get to choose is so freeing - and so terrifying.

No one can tell me what to do.

But no one else can bear the consequences.

There is one exception to this: the cross. And I love this.

(I wasn't intending this to be about Jesus, but apparently, I JUST CAN'T HELP MYSELF. One of the consequences of choosing Him over and over. Heh.)

Jesus bore the punishment for our sin on the cross - a consequence we would not survive doing. But the magical thing is: He didn't take away our choice. We can still choose which consequence we want.

Such a respecter of personhood He is.

Things I am currently choosing:
I am choosing to put my emotional health over my physical health.
I am choosing to eat delicious things, and not worry about "calories."
I am choosing to spend time with friends.
I am choosing to serve at church.
I am choosing to be creative.
I am choosing to study the scriptures.
I am choosing to avoid Facebook.
I am choosing to not worry. (This ... is more of a process that I'm TRYING to do.)
I am choosing to take a chance on my creative abilities to support me. (SCARY! ZOMC!)
I am choosing to buy some things, and not buy other things. <- this works way better for me than a "budget." Just a personal thing.
I am choosing to help other people, when I can, which is NOT all the time. <- HARD choice! =_=
I am choosing to accept help.
I am choosing to ask for help.
I am choosing to not confront people at this time. This is one of those rock and hard place choices where you can't see all the consequences. :/
I am choosing to NOT let other people control me, my time, my resources, my emotions. (Still ... practicing this one. I'm getting better!)
I am choosing to spend money on tea, because tea makes me feel awesome. ^_^
I am choosing to avoid people who stress me out, including Facebook. <- WEIRD for me. Usually, I feel it is my "duty" to be kind and sociable with everybody. Nope. I get choices! =D
I am choosing to let this blog post run on for-EVER! <- maybe not everybody will read all to the end. I'm okay with that.
I am choosing to relax today. And it feels AMAZING.

What are YOU choosing?